Peanuts

I do not know the source of this story. Those viewing this in translation may wish to read the synopsis below because this story will probably not translate well.
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The new preacher in town had for several days been visiting all the church's elderly members and especially those who were "shut-ins" in poor health. Blanche was the last person on his list.

Blanche was a kind old lady who had long ago lost all her teeth. She absolutely refused to get dentures and therefore had the sunken lips look of a very old person with no teeth. Her speech was affected by her lack of teeth. She was delighted to see the preacher.

"Oh, preachah! I'm tho happy to thee you!"

"Blanche, I'm glad I could come by."

The two sat on the couch and talked about the church and Blanche's health until the phone rang.

"O, preachah,  I gotta go get that. Ith probably Hortenth.  The callth me every day about thith time. I'll be back ath thoon ath I can."

"OK, Blanche. I'm not going anywhere."

 The phone call seemed to drag on and on and the preacher felt a rumbling in his stomach. He saw a bowl of peanuts on the end table and knowing that Blanche would not mind, took a small handful. Then another handful. Then another. Suddenly, to his dismay, he realized that he had consumed the entire bowl of peanuts.

When Blanche came back into the room, the preacher apologized profusely, but Blanche was not concerned.

"Oh preachah, thath OK! I done thucked all the chocolate off of 'em anyway!"

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This is a joke story: A new preacher visits an elderly church member and in her brief absence to answer a phone call eats all the peanuts from a bowl on a table. When the preacher apologizes for having eaten all the woman's peanuts she tells him not to be concerned because she had already sucked all the chocolate off the peanuts.

Book Comment: An Encyclopedia of African American Christian Heritage

Many people would rather stick a pencil into their eye than to read a book of history.  That really is a shame, because history helps us to understand where we have been and how that affects where and who we are now.  Christians, especially, are a historically based people.  To really understand Christianity, it is necessary to learn about the mindset and history of a world almost totally alien to our modern world but on which our modern world is based.

All Christians worldwide are part of the same family.  All those who belong to Jesus, have the Mind of Christ.  Yet, often, we misunderstand one another.  How much does a Christian in Norway know about Christians in China?  How much does a Christian in Belarus know about Christians in Greece?  Do you know about the military saints or the Fools for Christ?  How much do we know about Christians in other religious traditions existing side by side with us in our own home areas?

In the United States, how much do white Christians know about black Christians and vice versa?  We have lived together for four hundred years but many whites have never been into a black church and many blacks have never been into a white church.  Study of books such as An Encyclopedia of African American Christian Heritage (Judson Press, 2002) can help us understand one another.

The book by Marvin A. McMickle is divided into chapters of short essays on the following subjects: Denominational Founders and Leaders, Preachers, Teachers and Scholars, Politicians, Prophets, Nationalists, Cult Leaders, Singers and Songwriters, and Movements, Terms, and Events.  Good historical studies do not turn away from discussing the unpleasant along with the positive and this book exposes the warts along with the beauty.   I heartily recommend this interesting and useful book.

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A general caution: books may give you wonderful new insights and explanations of subjects, but you should never base your Christian beliefs on any one book or the teachings of one person, no matter who they are. All teachings must be consistent with scripture. Read as the Bereans did, with discernment. “… for they received the word with great eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see whether these things were so.” Acts 17:11 NASB

Any doctrines must be consistent with the historical full body of Christian thought. Doctrines or teachings inconsistent with scripture in any way must be rejected. You would not eat cheese which had a fuzzy fungus growing on it.

Impersonations of Famous Preachers

(Some videos will not play properly when you click on the triangle.  Instead,  click on the title line in the picture and the video will begin .  When the video is completed, close the You Tube pop-up window to return to this blog.)

Crossed Messages

“A preacher died.  Shortly thereafter a man with the same name went on a business trip to a southern state.  He sent a telegram to his wife, but it was delivered to the preacher’s wife by mistake.  It said, “Arrived safely.  Sure is hot here!”

“From The Big Book of Church Jokes, published by Barbour Publishing, Inc. Used by permission.”

The Preacher and the Little Boy

“A preacher was repairing the fence around the old country church.  He noticed that a small boy had been watching him for some time.

“Do you want to speak with me, son?” the pastor asked.

“Oh, no,” the boy replied.  “I’m just waiting.”

“Waiting for what?” the preacher asked.

“Waiting to hear what a preacher says when he hits his finger with a hammer!”

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“From The Big Book of Church Jokes, published by Barbour Publishing, Inc. Used by permission.”